Gifts from grandparents for expecting parents

Quick answer

The gifts expecting parents tend to value most from grandparents are the ones only grandparents can give: dependable help and time, family history passed on, and quiet support for the parents' own choices. Practical items work best from the parents' list, and anything personalized works best planned with them rather than as a surprise.

What do expecting parents want from grandparents?

Mostly, to feel supported in doing things their way. Your son or daughter is about to make many decisions for the first time, and some will differ from the ones you made. A gift that backs their choices, even quietly, often means more than the gift itself.

A simple approach is to offer, then follow their lead. Ask what would help most, and take the answer at face value, even if it is not what you had in mind.

How can grandparents give help and time?

Time is the gift grandparents are often best placed to give, and it is easiest to accept when it is specific and reliable.

• A regular slot. One afternoon a week, or a set morning, gives the parents something to plan around.
• Practical jobs after the birth. Meals, laundry, shopping, tidying and looking after older siblings or pets free the parents to rest and to be with the baby.
• Visits on their terms. Ask when to come and how long to stay. Arriving ready to do a job is usually more welcome than arriving to hold the baby.
• From a distance. Grocery or meal deliveries on dates the parents choose, regular video calls, and a visit planned around their needs rather than yours.

If you plan to stay for a while after the birth, agree beforehand on what you will take care of.

Which practical gifts make sense?

Start with the parents' registry or list. If there is a larger item they want, you can fund it in full or put money toward it with others. Ask about brands, sizes and colors before buying anything off the list, and include a gift receipt.

Before passing on furniture or baby things from your own home, ask first. Parents often have specific preferences, and it is easier for them to say no to an offer than to a delivery.

What keepsakes can only grandparents give?

Some of the most lasting gifts take time and memory rather than money:

• Write down family stories: how you met, what the parents were like as babies, the places the family comes from.
• Label old photos of the parents as children with names, dates and places, and put them in an album.
• Collect family recipes in one place, with a note about who made each and when.
• Write a letter to your grandchild to be opened when he or she is older.
• Record yourself reading a favorite story or singing a song from the parents' own childhood.

These keep for decades and take up almost no space.

Is a parenting book a good gift from a grandparent?

It can be, with care. A parenting book from a grandparent can read as a hint that you doubt the parents, so it helps to present it as a reference for them to use however they like, or to ask first whether they want one. Advice also changes between generations, so share your own experience as stories rather than rules.

If you are choosing a book, our guide on how to choose a parenting book sets out what to look for. Our own book, FOUNDATION, is one option. It is personalized from family details, such as names and an illustration choice, so it works best planned with the parents rather than as a surprise. How it works.

Questions grandparents ask

Should we give a gift before the baby arrives or after?

Both can work. Before the birth, the most useful gifts are the things the parents need ready. After it, help and time often matter more than objects.

Is giving money all right?

Yes. Many parents welcome it. Say what you hope it goes toward, or let them decide.

What if the other grandparents are giving something bigger?

What parents remember is usually care and reliability, not size. If it helps, coordinate with the other grandparents so gifts complement each other instead of competing.

All stages · Gifts for first-time expecting parents · How to choose a parenting book

FOUNDATION by THIS CHILDHOOD is a personalized digital parenting book, delivered as a PDF and an EPUB, that runs from before birth to 18. About the book

A note from the book

This guide assumes a generally healthy, full-term child, and it’s general education, not medical care tailored to yours.

Prematurity, growth concerns, a disability, illness, allergy, a feeding difficulty or medication can change that plan. If one applies, the book says to ask your child's pediatrician or specialist what changes for your child. It also says research hasn't found a parenting formula that guarantees a particular outcome.

This book has not had independent clinical review.